After my last post about 50 Cent, it looks like Dr. Dre and his associates are planning chart domination this year. Eminem’s the latest of Dre’s pals to resurface for 2009, and his supposed new single Crack A Bottle is already leaking all over the internet.

And Crack A Bottle features the unholy trinity of Eminem himself, with guest appearances by Dre and 50 Cent. (Remember when they used to invite Xibit along to this stuff? He’s too busy pimping rides these days :().

I’m trying to work out where this fits in Eminem’s catalogue. It’s not quite the novelty, funny Eminem, nor is it the rage-filled, scary Eminem either. Yeah, he’s paying lip service to getting wasted and the hip-hop lifestyle: “So crack a bottle, let your body waddle/Don’t act just like a sloppy model, you just hit the lotto” – but none of it’s really convincing me!

What I’m trying to say is that Crack A Bottle is nowhere near as hard-hitting as Eminem’s previous work. From someone who remembers how relevant Eminem’s first few albums were – angry, frustrated and frightening married to sexual deviance and comic-book violence. Back then, Eminem had something to say.

As his career progressed, I wondered what the effect of fame and fortune would be for him. I wondered if he’d still have anything relevant to say or if he’d stray into writing for the cash instead of the outlet. You can guess what I think of this single then, can’t you?

I just wonder if the whole Relapse album will suffer from the same lack of relevance and conviction.

Reading about the new book on the Billboard website, I was intrigued with this line:

The book is 200-plus pages worth of text, behind-the-scenes photographs and reproductions of Eminem’s original lyric sheets — hotel stationery and other scraps of paper he used to scratch out partial verses of the songs that would make him famous.

I’ve highlighted the relevant piece – reproductions of his lyric sheets. OK, I’m happy to read the words and look at the various pictures of Marshall growing up, but how the hell do you do a reproduction of a lyric sheet? Find various bits of scrap paper and napkins and write it all out again?

Anyway, to those of us who were ‘enchanted’ when Eminem first appeared on the scene, this book will be an interesting look into his life. Certainly, the highbrow broadsheets who praised his autobiographical songwriting and no-holds-barred lyrics will be lining up to claim this biography as a missing piece in the puzzle that is Marshall Mathers III.

So, over the coming weeks, you’ll be hearing Eminem’s take on the events from his past, including when he trashed a room after being insulted by a puppet on TV. Seriously.

I’ll be interested in that brief affair with Mariah Carey and the slanging match that followed. But, like the broadsheets above, I’ll be most interested to find out a little bit more about the man behind the music and where he came from.

It sounds like Slim Shady might be coming out of his self-imposed retirement for a fifth album if reports from Entertainment Weekly are correct.

It’s been four years since Eminem’s last album Encore, and recently rumours have suggested that his health was suffering and that he may have had a minor heart attack due to becoming overweight.

Em’s apparently got some stuff on his mind, the kind of deep thoughts only an album full of scathing rap tracks would do justice to. In fairness, we thought he’d originally retired because all the dough from his record sales had taken away his bitterness and the bite that attracted us to Eminem in the first place!

What we need is plenty of anger and Shady’s unique ability to offend every demographic while selling stacks of records to their kids. It is said, when the charts are in danger of plumbing the very depths of blandness, a true hero will return to lead us out of the darkness.

Welcome back, Slim…