Tom Fletcher from pretend rock band McFly has been lamenting the lack of credit people give to their amazing songwriting skills.

Apparently, if Guy Chambers had been the master craftsman behind such hits as I Wanna Hold You and The Heart Never Lies, the world and its auntie would be lining up to fellate him. However, because the songs were written by the four worst haircuts in pop, McFly get no Ivor Novello love.

According to Tom, who’s presumably had to double visits to his therapist as a result, “Someone once said to me that if Oasis had done ‘Room On The Third Floor‘ it would have been heralded as one of the greatest songs of all time. I said to them, ‘You could be right’.”

Well, in a world exclusive, we reveal the real reason that McFly’s songwriting doesn’t win any awards….

They’re rubbish.